Baby update – Pregnancy Journey Journal

Monday 26th April 2021

Today is the day we get to find out if we’re having a little girl or little boy and I couldn’t be more nervous and excited at the same time.

I’m so excited to finally know the gender of my little baby but so nervous that there may be problems or complications, it’s been my biggest fear since finding out I was pregnant.

Almost everyone in my life (apart from about three people) who think my baby is going to be a little girl and up until two days ago I whole heartily believe my baby was a girl too. What made me second guess? it was a dream I had on Saturday of my baby sleeping in a moses basket and my baby was a boy in my dream wrapped up in a blue blanket. I remember telling my partner and family that that was my baby telling me he was a boy, especially because I’ve spent most of this pregnancy calling my baby a her as I was that sure then that’s what my baby was going to be. Now? I’m really not sure. Though after my dream I’m now leaning a little bit more over to a boy.

It’s 12:16pm and just under two hours before we get to find out what gender our little one is. So exciting!

Some BIG news! – A Journey into Motherhood

I have some exciting and life changing news that I wanted to share with you all. It’s taken me a little while for it to sink in and we’ve kept things quiet to allow us some time to let our news sink in fully, as it came as quite a shock to say the least.

My sweet-pea, first baby scan, scan photo, motherhood
My sweet-pea, first baby scan

But my big news is….

I’m Pregnant!

Yup, you read that right.

I have little bun in the oven, as they say.

When I first found out I didn’t what to think or what to feel. I did end up telling one of my younger sisters first, before telling my partner an hour later, and then my mum. I’ll never forget my mums reaction, she was SO happy, she threw her hands in their and gave a little dance in celebration. I really wished I’d decided to record telling her but there were so many thoughts and emotions running through me that I just wanted to get it out, to tell those close to me. I really needed support and my family is my best support system.

So far pregnancy has been well and truly hitting me hard. I’ve been hit really bad with “Morning” sickness, It’s not been pleasant. I’m still struggling with my eating disorder which comes with it own challenges and even more thoughts that fill my head. Am I eating enough? Is my body strong enough to carry this pregnancy through? Am I giving my baby everything he/she needs? Am I doing enough to see this pregnancy through healthy? Those of which are just the tip of the iceberg of thoughts that barge through my mind on a daily basis.

But despite the bad, despite my own fears, baby is doing amazing and I’m really excited to go through this new journey of motherhood.

For so many reasons I thought this day would never come and although I would have perhaps waited a little longer…. If I had the choice, I’d have things go exactly the same way. I wouldn’t change a thing.

This baby doesn’t know it yet, but he/she is already So loved and adored by many. She/he is already bringing a little light into people life, it certainly has in mine.

scan photo, baby, baby scan, first scan, motherhood
My sweet-pea, first baby scan

I went for my very first scan on 2nd March and I can’t even describe to you what it felt like when I saw that little baby pop up on the monitor or how relieved I was when they told me there was only one in there! I had a little cry to myself in the car while looking at the scan photos. I just felt this huge wave of relief while me and partner sat there watching our little baby kick her/his legs out and show herself/himself off a little (although he/she was being stubborn and refusing to move from her/his spot so we couldn’t get any face shots, all side shots while she/he floated upside down in the lower part of my belly).

I can’t wait for this “morning” sickness to fade, for the exhaustion to ease up so I can get to enjoy more of the experience of being pregnant because I won’t lie, so far it just feels as though I’m walking around with a constant cold of some kind between the “morning” sickness and constantly feeling drained.

I still almost can’t believe it, I find myself constantly staring at my scan photos. I can’t wait to find out the gender and more so I just can’t wait to have this little baby out into the world and into my arms.

Motherhood is my new journey, I’m scared, I’m excited and I’m so ready. More so than I thought I would ever be. And thankful to have my soul mate right there along side me through it all.

Its going to be crazy & amazing going from just me and him (and our cats) to having this tiny little human to care for and look after.

my little sweet-pea

January 2021 – A New Journey

January 2021 – A New Journey

2020 has been an insane year for all of us. It has thrown some real challenges and devastation upon us while testing us all to our limits. A lot of people’s mental health have been affected more so than ever, people have lost their jobs, their homes, their sense of security and safety.

The whole world went into a worldwide scare as we faced a worldwide pandemic due to an out break of coronavirus, and with some of leaders failing to guide us through such a stressful and unusual event it has made getting through this pandemic a lot harder and a lot more frightening as some countries have been left feeling as though they are fending for themselves due to the lack of guidance and control over the situation. Some of us have lost family members, friends and other loved ones from the hit of COVID-19

We have all been tested to our limits in our owns ways and have had to face many challenges that I’m sure a lot of us could have done without. Not only has this pandemic affected us all on a personal level but it has also affected us all on a business level. With countries going into lockdown in the hopes of containing and stopping the spread of the virus a lot of people had to leave their jobs, a lot of people got fired from their jobs as a lot of businesses failed to meet their money target for this year. Businesses were forced to close their doors temporarily in the hopes of containing the virus, thinking…well more like hoping, that they would only need to do that for a couple of weeks. However for some unfortunate and struggling businesses, they have been forced to close their doors forever putting them and their employees out of work.

The NHS and Key-Workers have been pushed more than ever also. With NHS workers/nurses/doctors risking their lives to help save our loved ones lives there have been a lot of show of support of them (but yet still not enough) as we thank them for working tirelessly to keep our loved ones alive and healthy.

People who never even considered dying their hair have gone as far as to self-bleach and dye their own with the trending hashtag (At the time) #Lockdownhair. I myself have been hit with a new hairstyle, a much shorter one I never thought I’d be brave enough to try out, despite my reservations and fears about short hair I have been finding a new hidden confidence in myself that never would have.

businesses, workers and just about everyone around the world started relying on the internet, on social media, group chats, and home deliveries to get them through this confusing COVID-19 pandemic.

As we had to learn to distance ourselves physically from those we love, we reached out to the internet and social media in the hopes of trying to replace that lost and lonely feeling. Divorces have gone up, relationships (friendships, platonic, Family relationships, romantic) have been tried and tested, and a lot of people unfortunately got to experience a little of what a lot of us who have suffered from mental health most of our lives are coping. Mental Health has become more talked about more now than ever, with thousands having their sense of safety and socialism taken from them and their world turned around.

To put it simply, 2020 has been one hell of a year, a year that has changed the world.

Like everyone else I and my family (close and distant) have not been without our own struggles, but as always they have shown a strength that I can only hope to/have when facing my own challenges.

2020 became such a unsuspected, challenging, frightening and unknown year. And despite that I am honestly looking forward to starting 2021 journey. The lows and the highs. After this year, if I have taken anything from it, it’s not to underestimate yourself and that there isn’t a thing you can’t get through as long as you have the right people trying to support and help you. It’s also not to take health for granted and I’m more determined than I was back when I started my yoga journey in 2019 while starting my recovery journey with my eating disorder to keep my focus on my health.

With that being said, This year brought me into a whole new journey of healing, one I feel will bring its own adventures as it follows me into the New Year of 2021.

I have no clue what this year holds for me or for you! But I have a feeling this year is going to be the year of self-discovery for everyone.

despite the load of shit-storms we’ve had thrown our way this year, that isn’t to say that 2020 didn’t come with its good moments.

Here in Liverpool, we never got a our snowy christmas day. However, we were graced in the wee little hours of the morning with a small blanket of snow. It wasn’t enough to get some “Winter Wonderland” though I did try (they didn’t turn out any good) I did end up accidently capturing a little blurry snowflake on my camera!

The sky has been incredible this year! And I’ve found myself looking to the sky more this year than my entire life. Just check out some of the incredible “shows” our beautiful sky has put on for us this year: –

  • Series of supermoons.
  • Moon passes in front of Mars.
  • Meteor shower drought comes to an end.
  • Lunar eclipse on the Fourth of July.
  • Jupiter, Saturn to take the spotlight in the summer sky.
  • Perseid meteor shower.
  • Blue moon to glow in Halloween sky.
  • Moonless sky in store for peak of the Geminids
  • Total solar eclipse to darken sky over South America
  • Super conjunction of Jupiter and Saturn

I was not only lucky enough to witness most of these, I was lucky enough to capture all the supermoons on my camera!

I, myself, have overcome personal challenges, faced some frightening situations and through it all I have found a deeper strength in myself. I have found that I can still somehow function through a LOT of stress and a LOT of worrying.

I’ve been able to keep my anxiety down, my eating and weight is still all over the place but I’m happy to say that I’ve at least managed not to lose anymore. I’ve still managed my solo or couple walks in the wooded areas away from other people and I’ve spends a lot of this year starting a few new online courses and taking pictures, making whatever memories I could.

I strayed away from my blog despite my efforts, I found myself with little interest in writing this year, so much so that I still have a few new empty notebooks laying around! Usually they are half way filled with words by the end of a year however I don’t feel any loss towards my lack of enthusiasm for writing this year. I’ve seen it as a pausing point, a point in my life where I needed to take a bigger step away from social media and away from my blog and focus on my present life and the world moving around me not around the internet.

2020 has brought with it an inner peace within myself that has changed so much the way I think and look at situations and for that, pushing aside the bad of the year, I am grateful for the challenges and I can’t say that I took nothing away from 2020 because I’ve taken more from that year than I have any other.

I’m more focused on myself, on my emotions, my passions, my body, my hunger, my abilities and health thanks to 2020, my eyes are open to more positive things and I’m able to recognise a bad situation and detach myself from it rather than invest my emotions into it, just as I am now able to recognise a positive moment and keep it at the forefront of my mind ready to get through another difficult situation.

I understand just how scary, devastating and unusual this year has been. I’m sure its made it difficult for a lot of people to push past all the bad, to focus on the little bits of good that has come from this year.

But I want you all to try, try to think of one or two good things that happened this year and hold on to them, let those good moments be your guide through the bad moments. And remember that our mental state and the well beings of ourselves and loved ones are what truly matters. Count your small blessings, enjoy and soak yourself in the little moments and don’t take for granted the things others do for us to keep us going, don’t take for granted those in your life and more than anything never let the dark moments become every moment. There is light in every dark situation, no matter how tiny it maybe.

I don’t know what struggles you face in your life but I believe in you! If we can make it through a year like 2020, we can make it through anything.

I hope you all had a magical christmas and a lovely new year.

And with that I’ll wish you all lovely 2021. Bye, bye 2020. I’m ready to start and get through 2021 adventures!

National Read A Book Day

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National Read A Book Day

National read a book day is an annual event, an a awareness day that takes place annually on 6th September.

For some people (like myself), reading is our ultimate form of relaxation, where all our stress and worries deflate and disappear as we are pulled into the authors world/time that they have created for us readers.

However for other’s, when it comes to reading, it can seem like a bit of a chore. National read a book day is celebrated to help encourage all of us to take a little break to curl-up and get stuck into a good book or read out loud to the family.

National read a book day is the perfect excuse to sit back, relax and get lost in a book, whether you’re rediscovering some old favourites or delving into a new bestseller, why not take advantage of the day and sink into a good story/tale.

Before you start wondering, how on this earth am I going to read a full book in a day? There simply isn’t enough time, not enough hours in the day!

Fear not! The intention of national read a book day is to motivate you to open your mind and eyes to a book for at least a few minutes of the day. To take that little break away from work, from our lives and get lost in a fictional characters adventures instead. It isn’t necessary for you to read a book from front to back, simply reading a page is good enough.

So whether you are an avid bibliophile, an occasional reader or simply haven’t picked a book up in a while take advantage of the day, spare a few minutes or hours of your time to pick up that book you’ve been thinking about reading and finally get started.

So don’t waste anymore time, sit back, relax and open up a book!

What way’s can I get involved?

One way to get involved is to help get the little ones involved!

If you have children, then today is the perfect excuse to sit down with your little one/s and read them a fascinating tale or maybe take an hour out of your day to sit down all together to read a book. Before bed if you don’t already why not read them a bedtime story.

Did you know?

  • Reading is much more of a complex task for our human brain rather than, say, sitting down and watching the TV
  • Reading also strengthens our brains connections and can also build NEW connections
  • Reading improves concentration
  • Reading can also help children learn more about the world around them
  • Reading also improves our vocabulary and language skills
  • Reading helps develop a child’s imagination
  • Reading isn’t just fun but it can also be a great way to spend time together!

There are many different benefits that are associated with reading, so what are you waiting for! Go pick up that book!

Hidden Beauty – Spring Equinox 2020

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Hidden Beauty – Spring Equinox 2020

March 20th 2020, marked the first day of spring (also known as Spring equinox or Vernal equinox) and the last day of Winter.

Coronavirus has taken over, it’s all anyone can talk about, think about and worry about. Because of this we are forgetting and missing a lot of life’s simple pleasures/beauty while we are all caught up in today’s panic, such as Spring.

Spring season is consider the period between the Spring Equinox and the Summer Solstice. Spring is also typically consider the season of rebirth, of blossoming new life, new beginnings and growth.

With the scare of the Coronavirus at the forefront of everyone’s mind it seems as though the world has stopped moving, and almost anything goes. But lucky for us, mother nature never takes any breaks and we are once again graced with another beautiful seasonal spring equinox.

Although the world is becoming more and more unknown and scary, we can still all take a moment, to take a deep breath and open our eyes to the simple beauty that surrounds us.

A lot of people love the Spring time because its usually the season where all the baby animals are born and running around and enjoying their new life. And because our fields, gardens are patches of greenery start to sprout flowers and other beautiful plants.

Essentially, The Earth comes to life during the Spring Equinox.

Birds are making themselves known, bee’s are starting to get to work on all those beautiful flower’s sprouting up, squirrels are running around playing with each other and climbing the tree’s. With less people loitering the streets/parks the animals and wild life are trying to reclaim their places.


Not only that but due to the lock-down a LOT of people are now focusing a lot of their time and attention onto their gardens (since that’s where they are spending a lot of their time these days) and the streets have never looked more bright or colourful than they do now.

Not only that but our sunrises/sunsets are becoming more colourful and breathtaking.


March 8th – International Women’s Day 2020

Today is March 8th, International Women’s Day. Today is the first day since entering this new decade that we get to celebrate International Women’s Day!

What is International Women’s Day, you ask?


International Women’s Day is a Day devoted to the movement for women’s rights.

Commemoration of international women’s day today ranges from being a public holiday in some countries to being a to being largely ignored elsewhere. In some places, it is a day of protest; in others, it is a day that celebrates womanhood.

in 1910, German delegates Clara Zetkin, Kate Dunker and others proposed at the International Socialist Women’s conference that a “special women Day” be organized annually.

In 1917, after women gained suffrage in Soviet Russia, March 8th became a national holiday there and after that? The day was then predominantly celebrated by socialist movement and communist countries until it was then adopted by the feminist movement in about 1976.

The united Nation began celebrating international women day in the international women’s year, 1975. In 1977, the untied Nation General Assembly invited member states to proclaim March 8th as the UN (United Nations) day for women’s right and world peace

Random Acts of Kindness Day 2020

SOMETIMES IT IS THE SMALLEST ACTS THAT CAN HOLD THE BIGGEST IMPACTS.

IN TODAY’S, DAY AND AGE WE ARE FACED WITH A GREAT DEAL OF EVIL AND NEGATIVITY THROWN AT US FROM EVERY ANGLE AND AT TIMES WE CAN GET LOST…SOMETIMES EVEN DROWN IN THE INJUSTICE AND BITTERNESS OF OTHER PEOPLE’S REVENGE, WARS, SUFFERING AND WORLD PROBLEMS. IT’S A LOT OF NEGATIVE SH*T TO CONSTANTLY BE SURROUNDED BY AND TAKE IN ON A DAILY BASIS.
BECAUSE OF THIS WE TEND TO FORGET THAT THERE IS GOOD IN THE WORLD, THERE IS STILL KINDNESS OUT THERE AND PEOPLE WHO WANT TO OFFER IT and have it offered.

Have you ever wished to live in a world where people showed more compassion for one another? A world where we see the strong struggling, the weak, the fragile, scared…the slightly broken and instead of labelling them, instead of mocking them, instead of having a part in their self hatred by making them feel less important or useless…everyone instead, helped them. Made them feel good, worthy and important.

What if we lived in a world where all we did was help one another? Were we don’t let our jealously and insecurities take over in the form of a spiteful comment or hate stare. One where instead we were simply…kind to each other.

Nation Random acts of kindness day is a day dedicated to those believers, to those dreamers who dream of a kinder world or kinder people in a world that can, at times, be cruel to those who inhabit it.

Celebrated on 17th February every year, National ‘Random acts of kindness Day’ has grown in mass popularity every passing year.

Random acts of kindness day is celebrated nationwide by groups, organisations and individuals. This is done in the hopes of encouraging other people to do these random acts of kindness.

This day is a day Favorited by many – myself included – as people everywhere are enjoying doing these little random acts of kindness.

Reasons you should get involved.

So, you might be sat there thinking to yourself, why should you care about today? Why should you take part in Random Acts Of Kindness Day? Well, I decided to take it upon myself to create a little list, listing all the reasons why I believe EVERYONE should get take part.

It can make a person’s entire day…maybe even week! Sometimes it can even save a life.



one small act of kindness in someone dark day can save a life.
You never know the struggles, the challenges or the demons that people are battle with every single day.
you never know when someone is at the end of their tether is ready for a way out.
You can’t be sure that friend who always smiles is smiling because he/she thinks they are finally going to end their pain/struggles.
you can never know that fashionable friend of yours suffers with bad self-image so extreme that they CONSTANTLY question who they are…because every time they look in the mirror, it’s a different person.
That person working so hard at becoming a cook? you may never know that they spend every second of every day/night battling with an eating disorder that is slowly cutting through their soul.

there is so much that we don’t see, so much that we still don’t know. We can never begin to guess what a person is truly battling with.
not all sickness is viable to the human eye.

More than anything, YOU CAN’T BE SURE THAT YOUR SMILE, YOUR FRIENDLY COMPLIMENT, YOUR OFFER TO JUST LISTEN CAN BE WHAT CHANGES THEIR DECISIONS.
You don’t always need to understand someone to help someone.

Compliments are life’s little treasures!

A SMALL COMPLIMENT CAN MAKE AN person’s entire week!

SO many of us suffer with self-image and INSECURITIES that we find our self constantly in a battle with ourselves. It can get so bad that it can eventually get depressed from it and you can find yourself obsessed/fixed how you look.
one bad comment about how we look can stick with us for a long while, it can play a loop inside your head and find a way to haunt your dreams. One too many negative comments can just be too much for our emotional/mental state. it can really effect people with what you say.

so, why not use that power to instead say something nice to someone? COMPLIMENT a FRIEND, a family member, a stranger.
A compliment can stay with someone for just as long as any negative comment, to spread some kindness, help someone rid themselves of NEGATIVITY brought on by someone else, by giving out a free and friendly compliment!

There’s just so much bad lately…a little kindness would be a nice way to greet the new decade.

last year… and let’s face it, most of the years before that, were terrible years to push through (for some of us).
There were a lot of deaths.
A lot of hysteria of clowns and attacks from terrorists.
a lot of people went through a lot of personal stuff and self-growth.
some people had to become a COMPLETELY different people just to survive.
….
last decade was rubbish.
It would be amazing to bring a little more kindness into this decade, to help wash away some of pain that lingers from last decade.
and to give hope back to those who need.

I could argue all day and make a 10-hour bullet-point presentation on why I believe everyone should not only take part into today but always carry this day with you through rest of this decade by giving out random act of kindness every day or week or month.

More than anything…you just have to be a nice person wanting and willing to do nice things. That’s what Random Act of Kindness Day is, it’s to remind you to be kind and show kindness! Those are who you’ll find celebrating and taking part in Random Act of Kindness Day.

But don’t just hold your random acts of kindness for only one day, do this every day, once a week, once a month! It doesn’t matter, just try to fit some acts of kindness into your life, and you never know, maybe someone will randomly repay you the favour through one of their random acts of kindness.

Get A Different Name Day

Today marks ‘Get A Different Name Day’ and for those who are only hearing about it now, have no fear! I will explain briefly what exactly ‘Get A Different Name Day’ is and why I am taking part/spending the day to celebrate this day.

Have you ever thought about what life would be like if your parents named you by another name? What if they chose that first name they were thinking of? What if they chose the family name? what if?…

I, personally have never liked the sound of my own name, when growing up it never did me any favours. I remember spending a good year or two stuck doing P.E with the boys because my name had been mistakenly placed in the boys register instead of the girls one – during one of many school moves – and for some reason they refused to change me over (not that it really mattered as I only ever brought in my P.E kit for badminton – it was the only thing I enjoyed and I was really good at it).

I’ve just always seen my name as too… manly? or something… it didn’t help any that my mum got my name from a baby boy’s book. She wanted a boy…she didn’t get a boy but decided to stick with the name anyway.

I have always begged my mum to change my name or to allow me to change my name but I’ve always been refused, as I got older the simple fact that I know how hurt my mum would be if I got my name changed is the only thing that has prevented me from permanently and officially changing my name. And even then I have to wrestle with myself not to get it changed.

So what exactly is Get a Different Name Day?


Get a Different Name Day is one of those bizarre informal/unofficial holidays that seem to have grown in numbers since the internet became such a world wide obsession.

Get a different name day falls on 13th February of every year. This unofficial holiday is copyrighted and was created by Ruth & Tom Roy, the founders of WellCat/com. Who took pity on the millions of us who for whatever reason hate their names.

Our name is not ever something we get to choose or have a say in, it is usually something that is bestowed upon us before or not long after our birth. It’s something that our parents decide for us.

There are a lot of people out there who are content and even like their name but there are a few (such as myself) who aren’t as fortunate to fall in love with their name or have one that fits who they are and their personality and some just have names that are too long or too hard to pronounce and others are just displeased with their names for no particular reason.

If you are someone who does’t like their birth name then Get A Different Name Day’ as an opportunity to change your name to whatever you wish. You don’t have to go out and legally change your name. You could just as simply inform your friends and family about your new name and that you expect them to address you by said new name.

It can be your middle name, a nickname or a completely new name instead of your birth name.

ONE YEAR BLOGIVERSARY

Well, It happened!

I’m not quite sure how, but I made it to a year of blogging!

Today marks my one year Blogiversary and I couldn’t be more proud of myself for sticking with it and making it to my first year of blogging.

My blog wouldn’t be a year old today if it wasn’t for my readers, supporters and followers. Starting a blog hasn’t been easy, and there were moments where I wanted to give in and delete my blog but with the encouragement and support from friends, family, my readers/followers and other amazing bloggers I toughed it out and stuck with it.

And it feels so incredible to be able to say that my blog is now a year old!

Despite the bad start to the year I did manage to find a few good moments through all the bad and even got out a bit to take a few photos. I’ve taken a LOT of photos of the moon already this year as well as of my cats that you can find over on my facebook pages:

  • LittleTinkablee Blog
  • Tinkablee Animal Kingdom

I have a lot planned this year and for the following ones a head so I am going to be slightly distance from social media for a little bit however I’ll still be engaging and my messages are still open to those who need it.

I couldn’t thank you all enough for sticking with me and reading through my posts and I hope that you enjoy or find help through my future posts.

The end of a decade and the start of a new. Goodbye 2019 and hello 2020

It’s so insane to think that we can now close the book on one decade and say goodbye to yet another year so we can start anew for the following decade ahead of us and the years that follow. I never thought I’d make it this far and honestly I’m in shock and proud of myself that I’ve reached this far. I’m proud of my family and everything they have survived this decade and in awe of their ability to pick themselves back up and keep going.

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Goodbye 2019

2019 for me has been one of my most peaceful years (mentally…) that I’ve had in far too long a time. Don’t get me wrong it’s still be crazy and I’ve still had a lot of really bad moments but for the first time in my life I was able to focus on the good moments too, enough that the bad hasn’t overridden the good.

If I were to comment on this decade, I would tell you it’s been one of the most insane, crazy, happy, intense, heart-breaking, nerve-wrecking and life changing decade I hope to ever experience.


This year on February 4th 2019 I start this blog! After a year of second guessing and going back on myself I finally went through with what I wanted to do and set out to “write my dreams” instead of letting my mental illnesses win and overrule my life. And it all started with this blog.

Since blogging I’ve been opened to so many amazing opportunities that had been closed off to me before. I’ve gotten to speak to some incredible authors and have come across some amazing book series (one of which helped bring me out of my year long reading slump: Heavenward by Olga Gibbs) and my review you can read here on my blog!

I can’t wait to see what opportunities are brought to me in 2020!

2019 blogging has also helped me with my own mental state, it’s helped me to understand a some of my mental illnesses and open my eyes to things I never even thought about when thinking about my mental illness. It’s also helped me to learn and understand about other’s and all the other different types of mental illnesses there are out there.

It’s been a great way to track and log my progress and although I’ve not done as much of that as I had planned last year, this year, I’m hoping to change that and open up more through my blog.

I’ve learnt new things about myself this year that I don’t think I would have ever realised or noticed before without starting this blog, It’s helped in my confidence and its made me even more motivated to write my novel, to go out there and become a psychologist and to have my blog running steadily through that time. I’m more motivated now than ever to go after what I want no matter what’s standing in my way, I know my worth and value and nothing and nobody is going to stop me for achieving the future I want for myself.

I even went on a few adventures with my love and little Toby (one of which I think I’ve written about on my blog) and even had Bella and Brad join a few (Bella is one of Toby’s best friends!). On one of my adventures with Dan we came across a really beautiful butterfly that even kept still long enough for me to snap a few picture of it! It was such a relaxing and wonderful day of walking about in nature and away from people.


2019 wasn’t just a great year for the start of my blogging life, it also became a great year for my health. I became a year free of smoking, I had gotten into my yoga practice a lot more, started a few new workouts and I had even managed to start eating more and gained weight for the first time in a years. Overall this year I have felt the healthiest I have in far too long.

Mental Health Matters

My mental health has also improved a little in 2019, I noticed I’ve had less break-down, less blow outs, I’ve managed to find a new coping method that helps me to manage my emotions a little better. They still get the better of me and I’ve not gotten complete control over them, but now I FINALLY have a way to gain at least a little control which is a big step for me.

2019 brought me inner peace.

2019 I learnt to let go of a lot of my negative emotions and thinking. I finally feel a peaceful in myself that I’ve been trying desperately to obtain for what seems like my whole life, I’m not feeling that constant war within myself that I’m usually battling with on a daily basis, I haven’t managed to rid myself of it completely but the feeling is there less now. Because of this a lot of my personal relationships have gotten better and I wouldn’t change that fact for the world.

unfortunately as usual with me I’ve ‘fallen off the wagon’ as the saying has goes and I’ve gotten myself stuck into a few old bad habits again, I’ve stopped eating and lost the weight I gained and due to my not eating I’ve decided to stop all exercising – not wanting to risk anymore weight loss than I’m already experiencing.

A lot happened in 2019:

  • Loki was born had his first Halloween and Christmas with us.
  • My sister and mum had big operations and are still recovering incredibly well from them.
  • I attempted Camp NaNoWriMo2019
  • My Kitt-Katt became a little senor cat this year
  • My little sister turn 16!
  • My little brother turned 13!
  • I did yoga with my little sister
  • I took my sisters to a Pusheen event in early celebration of my little sister’s 16th birthday
  • I was finally able to dye my last little sister’s hair for the first time. (It’s like a right of passage in my house)
  • I found out that the vets didn’t neuter one of my cats properly and caught him spraying out in the garden (luckily he’s too much of a good boy to do it in the house)
  • I also found out that my little Bear – who is two now – is Oreo’s son
  • I still haven’t gotten over how much Gizmo looks like her dad (my kitt-katt)
  • I met Cloud (My friends new kitten)
  • Spirit went to a new home and became best friends with his new brother Cloud
  • Spirit passed away a few months before Christmas
  • I’ve connected with myself
  • I’ve dyed my hair purple
  • Was blonde for a day
  • Then dyed my hair orange
  • Worked on myself and actually made progress!
  • I’ve baked a little in 2019
  • Spent many late nights working on blog post
  • Spent many more late nights working on my novel
  • My mums cat went missing for a week so I spent that week climbing over her garden wall into the wilderness behind calling her, leaving food, tuna, treats, and her cat carry (she’s obsessed with it for some reason) until she finally made her way back home to my mum.
  • I’ve learnt a lot about myself in 2019
  • Experienced some extremely frosty mornings but no snow…
  • And entered the 7th new year with my Dan

Now that we are in 2020 it’s time to give up those bad habits again and focus on my health. I plan on getting back into my yoga practice as well as my work outs and hopefully eating a bit more food on a regular basis.

I also have plans to get out a bit more and to complete another online course for my psychology. My mum got me a new camera for Christmas so I’ll probably be taking a LOT of pictures while testing it out and getting a feel for it (I can’t wait! I’ve already used it a few times for some cat pictures and moon pictures – I a little moon mad :P).

I plan on taking this year a little slower in the hopes that it will help me work through my messy mind and bring to life all the ideas that are cramped inside. I have a lot of hope for this decade, I lot things I’m hoping to see come to pass.

I also have a few book reviews that I was meant to get through in 2019 but either unfortunately forgot about them (it’s what happens if I’m sent them online rather than in physical form – unfortunately its out of sight out of mind with me as my memory is awful – or simply just haven’t been able to get round to them yet but I’m not taking on any more book review until I’ve gotten through and posted the ones that I was hoping to have out before the start of 2020.

Before I leave this post and wish you all a great year and a great start to a new decade I just want to thank everyone who has helped me, supported me and stuck by me through these months. I’ve almost made it to a full year of blogging! And it wouldn’t have happened with out your support and encouragement and there are just a few blogs I want to leave everyone with the option of checking out.

These bloggers are some phenomenal, creative and inspiring people that has helped me through my own journey of blogging, mental wellness and recovery and I know that a lot of my viewers would either love or benefit hugely from checking these bloggers blogs out. –

That Autistic Fit Chick

The Mini Smallholder

Nyxie’s Nook

Readers Enjoy Authors’ Dreams

Wellbean blog

Fraser’s Fun house

BestieTalks

Pages Places & Plates

ColourlsSimplyArt

TimeToTalk

Inching Forwards

Leooooo – The Anxious Teacher

Unwanted Life

TRJ Blog – The Ray journey

Jack Deyes

And with that list of amazing blogger, I hope you all have a happy, safe and peaceful year and thank you all again for sticking with me through all my inconsistency.

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