Getting Our Monday Motivation On Can be Hard

(I originally started typing this post out before my yoga this morning, however I got very distracted, then even more distracted -I’m easily distracted, one of my many talents 😛 – and completely forgot I was in the middle of writing this post!)


“Hope is brightest when it dawns from fears.”

– Walter Scott
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Take a moment

Getting our Monday motivation on can be incredibly difficult, especially if you are anything like me and tend to experience the “Monday Blues” no matter how sunny it is outside. However where I have been making it my mission to change the way I think, in the hopes of changing the way I feel and function, I’ve been trying to find ways/things I can do to change when I am feeling…Off.

The main thing I have implemented into my daily life in the hopes of keeping myself, somewhat balanced in myself, is morning yoga. Every morning I am trying to get through a yoga routine. You can read in more depths the benefits I gain from doing morning yoga by clicking, HERE. Last week I changed my yoga routine up a bit to something a little more challenging.

I’ve also cut down my chocolate intake, cut down on my cups of tea and more or less no longer drink coffee. I’m still missing breakfast, and this month hasn’t been my proudest for my weight as I’ve lost quiet a bit of weight again, instead of gaining. I’m taking steps to getting my body and myself used to breakfast. I’m both disappointed and…a little relieved? I’m still fighting through and figuring out my emotions when it comes to self changes, both within myself and my body.

This, Monday, I have managed to get through one of my yoga practice and already feel 10x better. I plan on having a bowl of fruit and a homemade smoothie for breakfast this morning. I’m also going to be spending the say making more candles and wax melts, ready for my release date.

Tomorrow I’ll be posting my long awaited hair clip review for @Linziclip which I am super excited to share with you all. I’ve never really been one for playing around with my hair, because its weird thickness and texture and add in that it has a mind of its own, products, hair clips, straighteners or curlers, nothing ever worked on it! That was of course until I came across Linziclip hair clamp clips!

I’m also starting each day off with a positive, a motivational and inspirational quote, to get the positive vibes kick started and as soon as the weather is less…wet, I’ll be able to go on more walks and jogs.

Over the weekend I spent a day babysitting and decided to bake with the kids to keep them entertained and to give them something else that they can learn to do and feel a sense of accomplishment from, not to mention baking is just so much fun! And you get a tasty treat at the end of it! This weekend we decided to make a colourful unicorn themed cake, not only did it taste amazing, but it looked amazing too! I couldn’t be prouder of them for the cake they created! I barely had to do anything, I mainly just stood (sang along with songs) and supervised them and handled the oven part. (pictures of the cake below!)

Besides baking cakes with kids, my little sister has taken on my love for baking and when I went to see my mother the other day I was greeted to a home baked brownie, that tasted better than any store bought brownie you’ve ever come across, nothing will beat a home baked desert (other than home cooked food).

I have a lot to get through today but I’m also going to be making a stronger point to take little breaks, to do things differently and take a step back when necessary. When blogging you can come across some amazing people! But it can also unfortunately lead you to some… trouble people.

This year since starting my blog, my 6 to 7 year long internet troll has been trying to take on some of my traits, some of my personality, she has take my ideas and ran with them herself, she has gotten her family and friends and I assume “partner” too, to stalk my social medias as well as my blog posts. She has copied my life from the highs all the way down to the lows, she has turned my positives into negatives and taken my negatives and used them for her own personal gain an attention. However I have not let her or her crazy and her unhealthy obsession with me and my life get to me, I am still pursuing MY dreams and creating the life I WANT. And through continuing creating the life I want, I hope that she see that trying to be someone else doesn’t full fill you or give you the things you seek.

Being true to yourself takes courage and I hope that some day you’ll gain the courage to be true to yourself, rather than living behind a mask that is my life. But just know that I will not be stopping my blog because of you, I will not delete my social media because of you, I will not stop my future vlogging for your and I will not give up on my dreams because you are unable and creative enough to come up with your hopes and dreams. Until the day comes that she learns that this unhealthy behaviour is that, unhealthy, I will continue to write my blog posts that I hope can help her through her own personal demons as well as helping others.

I don’t hate this person, nor could I ever bring myself to hate another human being. Hate is just too strong of a feeling of an emotion and unless you have done some serious harm or damage to me, I don’t see the point in wasting/feeling such a strong emotion. I do Hope though. I hope she gets the help she needs, that she realises what she has done is wrong, that you don’t have to pretend to be someone else to have people like or accept you. Honestly picking me to copy from is probably the worst thing ANYONE could do. I’m no idol, I’m no inspiration, I’m a broken girl trying to make her own life, trying to figure out who she is, Taking back a life that mental health has overrules. My life is not a life you should copy, its one you should be learning from.

I know this post isn’t one of my typical posts and It’s incredibly short but the game is calling my name! I’ll have two new posts up this week, one of them will be a review post!

Thank you for taking the time to read and I hope you all have a lovely week ahead of you. To anyone out there struggling, please don’t be afraid to reach out and contact me, it doesn’t matter what I am doing, if you need someone to be there, to offer a non judgemental conversation or listening ear, then that’s what I will provide. No should have to suffer alone and I can promise you, you aren’t alone, all you need to do is take that first little step into reaching out & ask/seek help.

Stop writing Anxiety off as something small and minor!

This is a topic that has affected my life in more than one way, it’s something that creeps up on you and takes a hold of you without you even realising.

I am of course talking about Anxiety. The silent bully living in your head. I’ve been suffering from anxiety for far too long . I have spent many, many years trying to rid myself of this or beat this… sickness. I have managed to overcome it in many ways, while it has still managed to destroy me in many other ways.

I am so sick and tired of people treating anxiety as something as little as the common cold, something you just have to deal with until it goes away on it own because that’s not how it works, that’s not what anxiety feels like.

Anxiety for me tears into me every second of everyday, I wake up with it and go to bed with it, it’s become a full time house mate that I’ve never even wanted. It affects my mobility to move around and function as that of a normal person, my legs turn to jelly, i feel a though I’m floating out of my body and allowing something heavy and terrible take over.

Sometimes it creates an invisible wall, stopping me from moving, from going any further and continuing on, on my journey. It has stopped me from leaving my house for a little over two years and although I have overcome that part of my anxiety there are still far too many days I find myself not being able to leave the house.

I can get sick, I can start to shake until people start getting concerned that I’m going to take off like a rock in space. I loose sense of where I am because I end up so focused on the feelings it’s pulsing through me. It takes over me completely until I feel like am nothing but Anxiety.

And i’m so sick and tired of people thinking its nothing because there are ‘worse things out there’. Perhaps there is but those are not what’s ruining and taking over my life, Anxiety is, Anxiety has.

So many people suffer with this and yet don’t acknowledge it, they try sweeping it under the rug in the hopes that it will go away. Well I tried that one for years and Anxiety has still won over parts of my life, to this day it still attacks me and stops me from doing things I want to do most.

Anxiety makes you feel so useless and unworthy of even being around at times. I look at those who are able to over come the anxiety they have it makes me cry, although I’m happy for them and proud of them for being able to over come it, it makes me feel even weaker knowing my Anxiety is still controlling every aspect of my life.

People need to stop being so judgemental, watching and judging someone else’s life for what? because why? What does it matter if someone has anxiety, depression, BPD, SPD, extreme suicidal thoughts? What does their struggles have to do with you? Why do people feel the need to place them into categories that in their eyes matter most, because you don’t suffer or was able to over come your mental issue?

When are people going to wake up and realise that WE ARE DIFFERENT and that means dealing with different things in different ways, it means having something a little more sever than others, it means some people get lucky and don’t have to go through anything like this. It means that for others their problems really are all that big to them and trying to make them seem like nothing just makes the person feel like they are nothing. You are helping their problem take hold by making them feel as though they have no one to turn to, no one that understands.

I guess the point of today’s post is this, leave people be. If you aren’t out to help them, then leave them. Stop comparing things to other things all the time and remember that everyone deals with things differently, some people are handed a better hand than others, that doesn’t give you the right to make someone feel small because life has handed them something that seems bigger than it may actually be. In their world, it may be just as big as your problems may seem small in someone else world.

Try and be that positive voice in strangers day, be the positive impact in those you care for lives. Life is unpredictable, you never know what it’s going to throw you. So stop making it harder on yourselves and others around you.

Stop making people feel bad for having anxiety, stop thinking its something so little that it’s basically laughable to most people when its mentioned. Anxiety can hit anyone at any time, it doesn’t discriminate against ANYTHING or ANYONE and one day you could end up with such sever anxiety you’ll find yourself regretting ever second you thought anxiety didn’t mean much, that anxiety was something as little as a common cold.

Try and enjoy the life you have, find ways to make it better and help make other’s feel a little better. Kindness doesn’t cost a thing, so spread that free love and leave the hate and leave the negativity behind you.

My eating Disorder Story

My Eating Disorder Story

(So I started writing this post last week during eating disorder awareness week and ended up putting it on pause and writing other posts instead, I guess I wasn’t as ready as I thought I was to have my full story out there but it is something I want to help spread awareness on and so without further ado here’s my story so far).

Some of you may already be aware of ‘Eating Disorder Awareness Week’. A week dedicated to spreading awareness about eating disorders, people who have them, what it’s like and how to help.

This one hits home a little personally as I have been suffering from an eating disorder for many years now that I haven’t really spoken up on and haven’t really sought out any help on until recently. I have only recently just accepted and become aware of my own issues, after living blissfully (or so I thought) in denial for far too long, allowing those who loved and cared for me watch me turn into something… that could barely pass as a hallow shell of who I once was.

I had easily convinced myself that I was fine, I didn’t have an eating disorder, that everyone was being overly paranoid about my weight because I was just skinny, being skinny through my years I’ve heard it all about my weight. But back when I was younger I never really had a problem with eating, I had what was probably a great relationship with food but as I grew and my body grew so did my taste buds and the food went from tasting like heaven to tasting and feeling as though I had ripped off a piece of cardboard and popped it into my mouth.

I had started going days and weeks without eating when I felt too bad I would drink a lot of tea and suck on a few pieces of chocolate to get me through the day… That was only a year ago for me. It was only a year ago that I accepted that I did have a problem with food.

Because I’ve had so many people talk to me about my weight, worry over me about my weight I never paid them any attention. I’ve had so many people ask me if I suffer from anorexia or some other eating disorder, I didn’t care for it and didn’t want to hear it, it just started making me feel self conscious about myself. I went from only mildly caring about what I looked like to spending up to two – three hours getting readying and checking myself in the mirror. I started wearing more baggier clothing and avoided people I knew instantly would have something to say to me.

2018, summer, standing next to my blue haired pixie sister. It was the first time I had left the house in something other than my boyfriend hoodie and baggy leggings.

It always got to me the way people think they have the right to tell me what they think about my weight, It always seemed cheeky to me that they’d feel comfortable enough to let me know they had been staring at my body and decided that I was too skinny for them. I’ve had people who work with people like me treat me like I’m some delusional fool, I’ve had them think they were helping me when in reality they couldn’t have made things worse. I’ve had someone laugh in my face after telling them something someone has said to me about my weight or lack of as well as my flat-chest. This coming from someone whose job requires them to be sympathetic, understanding and no judgemental unfortunately it’s a trait people don’t know how to rid themselves of.

My spine was always sticking out, you could play it like a musical instrument if you had some sticks.

I guess that’s why I had spent so long in denial so determined not listen to them, telling me they were only letting me know because they were worried about me was starting to come off a lot more like that of scolding a child. It’s never a nice feeling to have everyone around you knock your character down to something small, tiny and voiceless. People started looking down on me, assuming they knew what was best, assuming I can’t handle a life of my own. People already have their thoughts on what they think I want, and they’ve never been so wrong in all their lives.

So with people making me feel as though I was on my own, that we weren’t on equal footing it made me distance myself a lot more from everyone. It made me cloak myself in the saying, “Don’t care what people think of you.” And I had, I’d really stopped caring what people have to say about me, about my life about the things they think I will or won’t accomplish in life. Or at least I thought I’d managed to stop caring.

I started to loose a lot more weight. I wasn’t necessarily that under weight when all of this started, being a small and petite female I have a really petite body frame and of course because of all that I was lighter for my age than others. But I never lost weight to the extreme of fitting into my petite 10-11 year old sisters clothing, it wasn’t to the stage that I was forever seeing every bone that my upper body owned, I had thighs, I had bum and little boobs. I wasn’t bad.

2016 was when my weight started to really drop, my boyfriend was concerned and always trying to get me to eat whenever he could. I was worrying my mother and siblings but I wasn’t paying attention to the way my health was affecting them. I’d convinced myself I was fine, and so that’s what I was, I was fine.

Reduced to nothing but fighting for something.

But I had stopped caring about what I looked like, I stopped caring about the things I wore. I stopped fitting into my clothes and settled for living in tights, leggings and my boyfriend hoodies. Sometimes I’d make an effort in what I wore but I had to borrow my 10-11 (At the time) year old sisters clothes as mine were too big and she was the only one closest to my size.

In 2017 I’d got hit with a really bad virus that had left me bed ridden for a month. I had spent days and nights throwing up whatever I could while not being able to eat anything or keep any liquids down. My family and boyfriend were really worry for me by this point but I kept telling them I was fine. I’ll get over it like I always do and get on with life as normal. Except once I had recovered from it I had taken a look at myself in the mirror and got a shock of my life.

I had found out why everyone was looking at me with worried glances, why my boyfriend wanted me to eat or drink whatever I could, why my mum (who due to her own eating disorder is very understanding with mine) was practically begging me to go to the doctors and seek out help.

I went from being skinny to being…nothing. In that month I had wasted away into nothing and to see that nothing staring at me in the mirror? it was a truly terrifying thing to experience, to realise. The week after I got myself down to the doctors and I have been in the hopes that they have been able to help. So far I have had major struggle getting help from any professionals however I have made my own steps in gaining the weight back since then.

Right now I am waiting arrangements from Talk-Liverpool and an Eating Disorder Clinic in the hopes that they can help me. I have taken my own steps in helping myself including, by keeping an eating journal and through yoga practice.

Left is when I was really underweight, the right a recent photo after doing a yoga workout

Stay tuned next week as I’ll be posting what steps I took in order to help myself once I came to terms with my eating disorder and what other eating disorders there are out there, I’m personally shocked by how many there are that I was so unaware of! I’ll also be sharing what a year of yoga has done for me and what it could do for you.

Writer’s Block

Being a writer isn’t easy and it’s made worse when you get hit by the much dreaded ‘writer’s block.’ An invisible blockage that stops the flow of words and ideas from reaching the writer.

Being an aspiring author myself and becoming a new blogger, I have found that writer’s block can and will hit you more than once. Receiving writer’s block is no fun task, nor is it something I would wish upon any writer/author. Sometimes my writer’s block can last for days, weeks, months and even years! Occasionally the creative flow you had can suddenly disappear without a word, one second you are on fire writing left, right and centre and then the next you’re wallowing in self-pity not understanding why the words are no longer coming to you like flowing water as they once had.

Writer’s block is simply this: A psychological inhibition that prevents creative writer’s from continuing with their work, writer’s block is a problem that obstructs the writer’s ability to tap into that part of their brain that comes up with the ideas/words. Writer’s block can prevent anyone from finishing their novel, poem, deadlines, post etc.

Anyone who has experienced writer’s block will know, fretting too much or trying to force original ideas can cause you a great deal of creative constipation. If you are experiencing anything like this/ or this is your first-time experiencing writer’s block then please don’t be alarm and don’t give up, you can get that creative energy flowing again, you just have to be patient!

I wrote a list below of all the things (you can try) that I do to help bring back my creative flow:

(1). Read a book. Now there is no denying that once I have read a good book or five… I am hit with a tidal force of inspiration and ideas! Filling your head with other people’s words, other people’s worlds can really help to inspire you’re own. After a good book, I can find myself writing for weeks afterwards!

(2). Eliminate all distractions. This one is easier said than done, personally, I get easily distracted and usually by my own thoughts and crazy ideas. To bring me back into “writer’s mode” I like to lock myself in a room with nothing – harder to do when you have three clingy cats that follow you everywhere- but a cup of hot cholate/tea/ coffee (I’m a little obsessed with all hot beverages), some food, chocolate and no internet. Just me and my words.

(3). Go for a walk. This is one of my three favourite things I like to do to help get out of writer’s block. There is nothing like walking along a park or through a wooded area feeling the breeze on your face and the little sunbeams warming your skin. Hearing the birds tweet to one another as you watch nature play its role as you take your peaceful stroll. I try to go for a nature walk at least once-twice a day.

(4). Change your environment. Sometimes a change of scenery is all that’s needed! Being cooped up in the same place day in and day out writing and researching doesn’t do anyone any good. Try taking your work to the park, a quiet little coffee shop and do you’re writing there! I have a little cafe fifteen minutes from where I live but I also really enjoy going to the Cat Cafe Liverpool early hours in the morning when my writing is at its peak and my mind is still in a creative haze. Once you’ve gotten over the overload cuteness of cats/kittens bringing your writing to life is almost like magic when doing it there. (Click the link if you’d like to know more about Cat Cafe Liverpool).

(5). Freestyle Write. Every day set a timer for 15-20 minutes and spend that time writing freely with no limitations. This will help stretch your brain muscle giving you the ability to be and allow yourself to be more creative with your writing in turn pushing aside your writer’s block!

(6). Read some inspiring quotes. This is my second favourite thing to do daily whenever I find myself hit hard with writer’s block. The internet is full of so many inspiring and motivational quotes, go out there and read them! I know people tend to overuse quotes but for the art of creativity, this one can be important as artists are forever looking for inspiration and supportive messages. (Click here to be directed to my post about book quotes! This will help get you started and hopefully, help in giving you the motivation to go out there and find quotes that speak to you.)

(7). Do something to get your blood flowing. A great way to prevent or get out of writer’s block is to keep the blood in your body flowing. To do this I like to do Yoga, if you are new to yoga then I’d suggest starting out doing Hatha Yoga (click here to learn about yoga and all the different optional practices open to you). Pilates and light workouts routines.

(8). Drink plenty of water and make sure you are spending time around those you love. Keeping yourself hydrated while surrounding yourself with good energy is another great way to get yourself out of writer’s block. People have a funny way of sparking that creative wick in your brain. Go see some friends, meet up with an old one? Go talk to a stranger walking their dog, I’ve come across a lot of lovely chatty dog walkers. I personally like to be around my family as pretty much most of them are really creative in their own way & I always have a sense of calm and belonging when around them. And my boyfriend, my right hand, my soulmate, a feeling so great I fear my heart may burst at times. The funny thing about being on this earth is that there are other people too 🙂 go out and mingle a little, push yourself out of your comfort zone!

(9). Listen to music. Take some time out of your day to listen to some music, whether you are listening to your favourites, old throwbacks you used to listen to or listening to something new, music is the age-old answer to any creative blockage.

(10). And lastly, go out and do something different. Teach yourself a new skill (I’ve started baking at least once a week with my little siblings), try out a new hobby go skydiving! Writer’s block is partly there because of the same old routine, sometimes you just have to spice things up a bit. Go out and try something new, something else creative and have fun doing it knowing that you may just climb out of your writer’s block after all!

We made blue cupcakes last week (I’ll link the post once it’s up!)

I hope this has helped you out of your writer’s block or at the very least I hope my post has given you a few ideas on how to climb your way out of writer’s block!

If you have any suggests that I’ve not mentioned drop them below in the comments, have a wonderful week!

Glad to be out of January? You are not alone!

I won’t lie, I got a rough start to the new year and I’ve pretty much sworn off drinking forever and coming from someone who probably drinks 3 times throughout the entire year… that pretty much means never ever again. Although I have been known to change my mind at times.

Although I wouldn’t really say that January was a total loss. I had two really great weeks where the mood was positive and the energy high. My workouts were going amazing and yoga has become my home therapy.

But more than the good vibes that were going around during those two weeks I had also accomplished a few personal goals of mine that have made me rather proud of myself.

But for me, two good weeks do not make up for the beginning of the year and the rest of the month being so terribly… chaotic. And with that being said I am so glad to finally have seen the light of February!

Personally, for me, February is one of three of my toughest months to get through and I usually find myself spending most of my time dreading the moment February comes around the corner but after last year I have made it my personal mission to change all the routinely bad things that go wrong in my life and find a way to make it positive.

This February I have decided to change what it means to me, I have decided to not let the bad things overrule a month that could hold a lot of potential for new opportunities that I usually miss out on due to self-pity and wallowing over things that can’t be changed.

                    A week or two before I was due to release my blog!

The first step to adding something positive into February was to finish setting my blog up and then releasing it out into the world. I originally planned on doing this a year ago but sometimes life has a funny way of ruining your plans and so I had to hold it off for a year.


The second thing was to start my yoga back up. Ever since things started going bad in January I strayed away from yoga, but now I’ve committed myself to doing “yoga therapy” at least once a day. I have to say that it has really helped a lot, it has helped me to take a step back and centre myself. Not to mention the physical benefits of it. I’ve created muscle I never knew I had, become more flexible than I thought possible and my back pain & leg pains that I’ve suffered with since I was really young is almost none existent!

The third thing I’ve done to help add a little positivity into my February happened by chance. I received a message from my mam telling me that my favourite stall had come back to the shopping centre but she wasn’t sure if the man doing it was still selling the incense sticks that I got really obsessed with three years ago. Also, Iceland started selling unicorn nuggets… so of course I bought some! Since my younger sister shares my love the mythical creatures we both ate the unicorns together (after taking pictures).

The same day I went to that shopping centre to have a little look and instantly spotted my favourite incense sticks, without hesitation I pick them up ready to purchase them but then stopped in my tracks. I wanted to get myself another one but with a different scent to it and so I stood there for another ten-to-fifteen minutes smelling and trying to decide which one I was going to pick next. I ended up deciding on ‘Mermaid Love’ which instantly reminded me of those small colourful sweets, FIZZERS and couldn’t resist buying them along with my ‘Unicorn Grace.’

Number four was when I bought a new notebook along with a new journal for myself. I can’t speak for everyone but I am simply obsessed with notebooks! I’ve loved writing ever since I was a little girl and I can never have too many places to jot down my thoughts, ideas, feelings, novels plans / (attempts) and so much more, there really isn’t anything I don’t or haven’t written about. If I love it, if it interests me or my family/friends/readers then I’m writing about!

The fifth to help me on my journey to a better February was to engage with more people, to put myself out there a little more and connect with other bloggers/authors. It’s really amazing what talking to other people can do to help the creativity to flow through you. 

Doing this was so incredibly hard for me, due to me extreme and sever anxiety and you are probably wondering how someone like me was able to do such thing. Well it’s pretty simple, I turned to social media, I created accounts for my blog and reached out to other like –minded people who then introduced me to other lovely people with different opinions, goals and hobbies. Some of the social sites I  used to achieve this is- INSTAGRAM \ TWITTER \ PINTEREST

We are almost half way through February and I plan to continue this journey of better days and better months. I feel the more you try to implement positivity into your life the more you start to notice all the positive things in life that you tend to miss during the bad moments.

I have also decided to buy myself a notebook, one I will use to dedicate to all the positive changes I want to make this year, as well as the goals I want to achieve.
I’ve also started writing novels again and I’m currently working on one that I have plans to publish once finished (I’m super duper excited for that). I want to get back into my photography and I’ve started the reading challenge on GoodReads that I’m really excited about. I’ve been a little out of touch with my reading & this has already motivated me to get back into. On top of that, I plan on taking more nature walks with my partner & enjoying all the little moment life has to offer. My notebook collection is only going to go up and I’m determined to stick to my new healthy lifestyle.

Baking, Candle making and therapy yoga is something I am going to be doing with my younger sisters and posting about our progress! I’m also going to be attempting a lot of fun DIY things with my younger brother and I’ll be posting our progress/results on that too. For the first time in a long time, it seems February has something to offer other than pain and bad memories.

I hope this has inspired some of you to go out there and make your month a better month or at least helped some with ideas on how to add some positive things/ changes into your life. My main advice for adding positive changes into your life is to do what makes you happy, what makes your heart feel light and what puts a smile on your face.

Thank you all so much for taking time out of your day/night to give this post a read and I’d appreciate it so much if you could give this post a like or share. If you have any advice of your own you’d like to share, please feel free comment. I’d love to hear your thoughts!